Morning Contemplation

I’ve never seen a round rainbow before.

I drive a specific route every morning and have been since the pandemic. North on South Broadway all the way up to 20th and back down Broadway just a few miles South of i25. It takes about 45 mins round trip.

But not before stopping at Starbucks for a venti pumpkin cream cold brew, no ice. I put on my mentor and drive.

His voice is soothing and it keeps me focused. The dopamine from the caffeine, his loving words, and now that it’s winter, the seat warmer all make this ritual the highlight of every day.

“You’ve got to love yourself, loved ones, no one else is going to do it for you…I can walk along side you to remind you of what’s possible, but you’ve got to want it. More than air…”

Today it’s -12 degrees and the homeless are in tents and under tarps. Everything else is under a blanket of white. The cars on both sides of me are having a hard time finding the lines that keep us in our lanes.

It reminds me of my mentors loving words. There will be times when I can’t see the lines and when I forget that the love is there for the taking. To support me and guide me. To show me how to keep from being too hard on myself. To create anew, the me that I want to be.

I get to 20th, and on Lincoln I am in the far left lane. I can either go on to California Street or to Broadway and I always take Broadway. It’s what I’ve chosen to be the perfect route so I can get my hit of love and devotion before I have to get home and hop in the shower.

As I make my turn and start to head South on Broadway there is a round shape around the sun as if the sun were a single eye looking right at me. There are little hints of rainbow at 3, 9, and 12 o’clock but the colors don’t track all the way around the circle.

I’m seeing this and am looking around at the other drivers and no one is looking at this magical thing happening right before our very eyes. One guy in a work van is eating a burrito, a lady to my right is driving someone who looks to be a dear friend, and another driver seems stressed and is possibly running late.

In my imagination I see myself frantically waving my hands to get their attention and then point to the sun, but out of fear of rejection, I don’t.

I pull over on Maple Street to take a picture and it’s gorgeous, it feels like it’s just for me. It’s unreal that no one else is seeing this magical occurrence. I snap a few pics and then hop back in my truck.

I text the images to some friends and no one notices what I’ve named the ocular rainbow. In the image there’s a street sign that mentions violence and peace. They notice that but not the ocular rainbow.

How strange I didn’t notice the sign. I noticed the name of the street Maple and thought all streets should be named Maple because of how rich and wonderful it sounds.

This again reminded me of my mentors words about love and devotion, and I guess all the streets could eventually have the name Maple, in my imagination. As long as it meant love and it took me in the direction to my true self.

Tears filled my eyes. For a moment I felt unworthy. Then I remembered all of his words about it being all for me. And the rainbow, and my paintings, and the drive. Yes. They’re all for me.

It’s funny what some people see to be glaringly obvious and what others miss entirely. I guess what they see is for them and what I see is for me.

My ocular rainbow was on the news that evening. They called it a dog’s eye. I think, and this is just a guess, they wanted to call it a god’s eye but decided it would be better received coming from a dog than from god.

🌈💛🌞